OVER IT

I’m mentally tapped. Just fucking over it. It’s fucking hard being a single mom of a soon-to-be 3-year old little boy. And taking care of a soon-to-be 16-year old senior pup is fucking hard, too. I have to life up Kahlua’s back legs to help her get up if she’s lying down on the hardwood floor…..which is most of the time. And then she poops on herself most mornings. I have to bring her outside and wash her butt. I love my Kahlua more than anything and it pains me to see her grow old like this. Plus, Kahlua can’t see very well and she has SELECTIVE hearing…..LOL! I think she ignores me when I’m calling her to come in from outside, but when food is involved, she’s ALL EARS! It seems like her back legs are getting weaker because now I have to help her up sometimes when she’s on the carpet. My sweet girl.

I’m just tired, man. I have to get Donnie now. He’s such a good boy playing in his room. He’s wiping boogers on his door right now— hey, it’s not poop, so I’m good. Just a lot going on. Going to be putting him back in daycare starting this Tuesday— I’m fucking nervous. I have to start looking for a full time MLO job. I’m going to start him out at only 3 days a week since it’s been 6 months since he’s been to daycare. I’m sure he’ll adjust just fine— it’s more ME, I think, that needs the adjusting of him going back. Please God, let him be OK there and not get sick…..not get that fucking COVID. Not sure what’s up with my mom…..she’s not asking to FaceTime with us— I’m always the one to reach out to her. I think she’s depressed. Her good friend, Judy, is dying of lung cancer…..I think she’s super sad about that. Ugh……just wish I had some help here in AZ.