Gary V says that every bit of your content should add value. I agree, but….here’s the but…..sometimes my content is just random thoughts….like right now— I mean, it’s a blog.i watched a movie tonight called “Puncture”. I was a bit concerned because it said “Lawyer battles his own inner demons”…..that attorney was a drug addict. That attorney died at the end…..I knew he would. He was shooting up heroin; doing coke; pills; drinking…..it was hard to watch him, but it was a good movie— good acting and well directed. Seeing him lie there, dead….dead on his bed…..did not feel good. That’s where my son’s dad was found dead— dead in his bed. He lying there dead for almost 2 days before
Read MoreI tried communicating with my son’s dad earlier last night, but no dice. So, I watched some tv, which I rarely do…..to try and “relax”. I had been up for awhile, so I decided to go to bed since it was almost 2am. I was sleeping on the couch downstairs to be with Kahlua (she’s still not 100% feeling better). I had my cat next to me and was snuggling with her, petting her. Then, my cat’s eyes started getting HUGE and her eyes were following something around the room. “Something” was hovering…….
Read MoreI think I’m so Hell bent on communicating with my son’s dad because I want some answers; I want him to apologize for all the shit I found out after his death; I want him to say how sorry he is for hurting me; I want him to see how beautiful our son is and I want some fucking closure. This PTSD shit is bullshit. No, I have not gotten therapy to directly deal with this— I’m scared to— I don’t want them to make it worse. Meaning, they open up the hole and I’m not able to shut it/heal it. I’ve been doing therapy since I was 16-years old— I honestly don’t know what other different kind of methods they’d try— I feel like I’ve tried them all. Yes, I recognize my close-mindedness and resistance right now— it’s an excuse for me to not seek treatment.
I attempted to contact my son’s dad again tonight — I even put on his favorite
Read MoreI was talking to Donnie’s dad tonight and wrote down messages he was telling me. And then another spirit interrupted our conversation and said a couple weird things!! It was so weird!! I knew it wasn’t Donnie’s dad because he would have never said what I wrote down. Still, very strange.
I have saved all Donnie’s dad’s voicemails and voice memos; however, not too long after he died— it was either a week or 2, I got a phone call at 1:11am. “They” left a message. The message was
Read MoreJust recently, I was asked by a friend how I deal with my son’s dad’s death— meaning, what are some of my coping mechanisms that I use. Let me tell you, it’s been a long journey dealing with my son’s dad’s death and it has NOT been easy— it’s been fucking tough as fuck. I cried for 4 months solid after I found out about my son’s dad’s death— that totally fucked up my poor sinuses. And I didn’t want to cry so hard and so constantly because I was pregnant! I didn’t want my little baby to feel this pain I was feeling. But my child is perfect…..emotionally and physically— I’m so grateful and blessed for that. I’ve had 2 sinus surgeries in
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